Friday, July 27, 2007

Day 27.....Believing Again

I remember heavy summer evenings when the tired sun would sink into the shadows of the horizon. When the last remnants of day would meet to mingle with the evening for a few moments before parting to say goodbye. The stars would begin to appear in the lavender twilight that gently gave way to the deep purple of the night.

Laughter and voices of my parents and neighbors chatting mixed with the sounds of crickets carried through the air on a hot evening breeze; as the other children on the block and I played just out of reach of their shadows.

A childhood melody that still plays in my mind.

Barefoot in the grass and cautious of the slimy slugs that seemed to find their way beneath our feet. We would watch as the night came alive. One by one they seem to materialize out of the darkness filling it with the flickering dance of fireflies.

Bright green glimmers of light lasting only for a moment before fading back into the darkness from which they emerged. Shrieks of surprise and laughter echoed into the deepest parts of my being as we chased them through the night.

I would reach for them; tiny star shaped hands wrapping around the little piece of darkness that seemed to shine. I would peak into my cupped hands amazed at the treasure that glowed within them.

Whispering to them I would give them my wishes for safe keeping then release them back into the darkness to carry away my hopes to the land of dreams.

Life was magical in every moment.

I sometimes wonder what happened to me that life lost its brilliant luster and tarnished as the years past.

When did I decide to stop seeing the magic?
Who told me it wasn’t real?

When did I stop believing?

Each month as the full moon begins to emerge I become an insomniac and with it's forthcoming arrival I could not sleep last night. I try to read, write to fight it. But there’s nothing to fight except myself; until finally I surrender to the truth that sleep will not come till its wants to.

I found myself outside beneath the canopy of night a bit before dawn. The time where the hard edges of the darkness begin to gently soften as the night fades into the light of day.

At the edge of my driveway I watched as a glimmer of light floated towards me.
One tiny glowing ember flickering in the fading darkness.

Alone in the silence of the lavender twilight of dawn I watched as it danced before me....
I began to cry as I felt the familiar stirring from within.

The voice of my heart.

Whispering to me gently.
Letting me know my hopes were mine.
No one had ever taken them away.
They had only been carried away for safekeeping in the land of dreams.
Until the time would come….

When I knew it was safe to believe again.

Until Tomorrow,

Mighty Morgan


Yours Truly said...

wow.. speechless..

honestly, i read all that, and i felt what you mean..

a good one!!

Vixious said...

May your day be sparkled with magical moments, Morgan. You are an incredible gift with an incredible gift. I'm overjoyed that you're finally beginning to see what the rest of us figured out long ago. :)*hugs*

Crushed by Ingsoc said...

Reading this blog for the first time on the basis of this post, I think you will get through.

Here's to the first day of the rest of your life.

El Gigante Verdoso said...

I know you'll do the miracle. You'll do it. You remind me a lot to a friend of mine, but he was not so lucky. HE didn't find the way as you have done and left this plane of existence to meet the Maker. Now my eyes are filled with tears because I miss him so much...
I have included a link to the lyrics, so when you read the song's lyrics you'll understand why I have dedicated my post to you. Just wanted to let you know you can count on me to help you as much as you can. I'm sending all my best wishes and good vibrations to you, and I'm sure so HE is. If I could I would give you a big, big, big, really big hug.

Your friend,

Greg Lunger said...

Thank you for bring some of my old sweet memories back with such beautiful words !!!******

May Blizz Caress you Always...

BillyWarhol said...

another amazing post of amazing writing like yer reading one o those fancy writers - Did U take English at Yale??

Very Ivy League there young Lady*


Good Luck down the Homestretch but I'm sure yer gonna make it - U seem really strong + i think U've also found yer Self yer Passion what U wanna do + what U believe in*

i think thass really important for addicts to have something that really engages them + basically gives them a reason for Living*

a reason to Stay Clean*

Cheers Mighty Morgan!! Billy ;)) xoxo


~Deb said...

You write so beautifully!

Bobby Revell said...

Morgan, I love the expressiveness of your writing and appreciate your honesty. I can dig it:)