Tuesday, April 8, 2008


Life has a way of inspiring me to embrace the absolute wonder and perfection that is etched within the framework of this existence. Through everything I have experienced thus far and all that I continue to experience I find that there is a greater rhyme and reason to all that occurs.

It was about this time last year when the pieces of my life I had worked so hard to put together began to crumble all around me. The job I had worked at since getting clean, I would soon walk away from. The apartment I loved so dearly was beginning to fall behind on rent, the car insurance had just lapsed, the bills were coming in faster then my ability to pay them.

The threads of beliefs that held my world together were beginning to unravel at the seams of my existence.

I felt so powerless in all that was occurring at the time. I didn’t understand why everything wasn’t working out the way I though it should, did not have the capacity to see past the outer frustrations that painted the picture of my life at that time. I couldn’t see that life was guiding me and directing me towards a path I had avoided for most of my adult life.

The path that would lead me to me.

For this moment in time, I have the inner knowing and capacity to see that all that occurred led me to where I am today. I had to experience the frustration, I had to fall apart, I had to let it all go. I had to let the outer conditions of my life fall away to allow me to see what lay beneath it all, to discover the path that would lead me closer to the life I choose to live instead of wandering in the circles of lies, beliefs and half truths that had led me nowhere time and time again.

I had to embrace the uncertainty of the unknown to walk the path that would lead me closer to who I really am.

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