Day 29 ... Cycles

Outside in the deep darkness of the night I stood alone looking up at the silver moon gazing down from above. Listening to the crickets chirp back and forth in the stillness of the night.
Breathing in the hot, humid summer breeze and embracing the perfection all around me.
Turning to go back inside, with my first step I slip on a slug.

Flip flops and slugs do not get along.
Especially at 2 am in the morning.

My only reaction...gross.
My point in that...none.

I had to go back and read this from day one today.
Had to see how far I've actually come.

"I've come a long way baby"

This whole experiment sprouted from the seeds of desperation. My life had become yet another existence I floated through wondering what the purpose behind it all was.

I wanted to know if anything was possible.
Had to know if I could really change my life.
Knew that if I tried nothing I would have just killed myself.

My only option was to change the dynamics of my life.
Change every aspect of my being.
Dig into the deepest parts of who I was to root out the beliefs that had continuously led me to a place in which I felt no hope time and time again.

Desperation is at times a gift. Within it's framework it offers the motivation to do whatever is necessary to achieve a purpose.

I was desperate.
I had to know.

I knew that if I had to settle for a life behind a desk.
Working for someone else.
Trading my time and energy for a paycheck.
Wondering why things were the way they were?
Living for the day that would never come for me to live out my dreams.

Swallowing whole the belief spoon-fed to me from others that "this was life, now just accept it."

I wasn't interested.

I knew that if I gave my all to change my life and nothing changed that I was going to kill myself. That's the way this whole thing started anyway...naturally if I did my best and still ended up in the same place I felt that there was no point.

I can't live in this world with the beliefs I once held as my own.
If that is what my life would be limited to...I didn't want to participate.

Nothing changes if nothing changes.
But everything changes once you begin to change.

I've changed...and so has my world.

The cycles of life are so entwined within every moment.
The lessons they contain are always there.
The results of the process are evident in all that inspires me.

But the seeming struggle that had to occur was what was wrong with my perception. I didn't grasp the understanding of the process is what created the beauty. Was and is the very thing that sparked the hope to continuously push forward regardless of the hopelessness.

I see that now.
I see that it was always there with me.
The understanding, the knowledge.

I knew all of it already...

I knew each fall would be a dance of a thousand shades of red, orange, brown and green dancing against the brilliant blue of the September sky before fading into the gray of winter.
I knew that each spring the world would come alive in the fresh growth of a million different hues of green of which a rainbow of colors would sway upon in delight.

I just had forgotten that I too was part of the very same cycles. I had to experience the deep dark, loneliness of a cold winter to embrace the warm sun of the spring.

The contrasts of my life have allowed me to discover more then I could have ever known...without them there would have never been any reason for me to search out another truth.

Everything had to happen exactly the way it did in order for me to find myself.


Until Tomorrow,
Mighty Morgan

Day 28...Finding the Beat.

When I finally fell asleep yesterday it was for only a little while, but long enough for me to fall into the dreamy slumber of la-la land. I awoke a short time later a bit refreshed and perplexed about the dream I had just emerged from.

Dreams are often the missing pieces of the ideas I can’t grasp when awake.

I think I was in a subway terminal, similar to that of Grand Central station. Masses of people all traveling to their here's and there's and me caught in the middle unsure which was the right way to go. I would push through the people just trying to find my way to no avail.

The more I pushed…the more they pushed back.

It went on like this for what seemed like an eternity. Finally I stepped aside, leaned back on the tiled wall and stopped for a moment.

Stopped doing the very thing that was causing such resistance.
Stopped to take a look at the whole picture.

Stopped long enough to hear that behind the shuffling of feet, laughter, crying babies, loudspeaker announcements, whistles, coins in cans, shouting…there was something else.

Music.

They were all moving to a beat of their own . Like one big wave of the ocean descending down. Each person a drop of water in the fluid mass moving together as one.

They were “grooving” to the universal beat.

Every person moved a little different.
Danced to a song all their own.
Some bopped there heads.
Others hummed softly to themselves.

Then there were the ones whose voice flat out boomed across the station in an acappella harmony that sent shivers up my spine. No one danced to anyone else’s song; there was no need to, for everyone had their own.

I awoke shortly after with small remnants of the dream still lingering in my consciousness, but not enough to fully grasp any type of significance as it related to my life.

My baby Brother(who is no longer a baby) engagement party was today. For weeks my family has been running around preparing for the party being held at my parents house. Now with all the food done, flowers arranged, decorations adorned and favors set aside…all that was required was the guests to arrive.

But we were not the only ones having a party that day.
Behind us was a block party.
Diagonal from us was a block party.
My hometown has become quite the place for parties in the past few years.

This was the first of them in over 12 years where I was no longer the outsider.

The drug addict.
The fuck-up.
The one they whispered about thinking I would’t hear.

I was part of the party.

Family members that used to play polite with me surprised me with real conversations that did not teeter on the edge of absurd. I ran around with my nieces and nephews, talked with Aunt’s, laughed with Uncles, and reminisced with my brother’s friends that had also been mine so many years ago.

At the end of the party I sat outside with my parents, my sisters, their husbands, their children, my brother, his wife to be…and old friends.

In the darkness we sat together laughing out loud.
Staring up in to the dark night sky.
Slapping at the mosquitoes desperate to get drunk from our blood.

I got up to get myself a soda from the cooler and before heading back stopped for a moment.

I listed to the beat in the background
The different music from all the parties going on.
Heard the laughter that mingled up from them all.

All of it occurring at once.
With no resistance.

All the many different aspect of us all floated high into the dark night with our laughter, mingling together momentarily before rising above to mark our presence as one.

Until Tomorrow,

Mighty Morgan

Day 27.....Believing Again

I remember heavy summer evenings when the tired sun would sink into the shadows of the horizon. When the last remnants of day would meet to mingle with the evening for a few moments before parting to say goodbye. The stars would begin to appear in the lavender twilight that gently gave way to the deep purple of the night.

Laughter and voices of my parents and neighbors chatting mixed with the sounds of crickets carried through the air on a hot evening breeze; as the other children on the block and I played just out of reach of their shadows.

A childhood melody that still plays in my mind.

Barefoot in the grass and cautious of the slimy slugs that seemed to find their way beneath our feet. We would watch as the night came alive. One by one they seem to materialize out of the darkness filling it with the flickering dance of fireflies.

Bright green glimmers of light lasting only for a moment before fading back into the darkness from which they emerged. Shrieks of surprise and laughter echoed into the deepest parts of my being as we chased them through the night.

I would reach for them; tiny star shaped hands wrapping around the little piece of darkness that seemed to shine. I would peak into my cupped hands amazed at the treasure that glowed within them.

Whispering to them I would give them my wishes for safe keeping then release them back into the darkness to carry away my hopes to the land of dreams.

Life was magical in every moment.

I sometimes wonder what happened to me that life lost its brilliant luster and tarnished as the years past.

When did I decide to stop seeing the magic?
Who told me it wasn’t real?

When did I stop believing?

Each month as the full moon begins to emerge I become an insomniac and with it's forthcoming arrival I could not sleep last night. I try to read, write to fight it. But there’s nothing to fight except myself; until finally I surrender to the truth that sleep will not come till its wants to.

I found myself outside beneath the canopy of night a bit before dawn. The time where the hard edges of the darkness begin to gently soften as the night fades into the light of day.

At the edge of my driveway I watched as a glimmer of light floated towards me.
One tiny glowing ember flickering in the fading darkness.

Alone in the silence of the lavender twilight of dawn I watched as it danced before me....
I began to cry as I felt the familiar stirring from within.

The voice of my heart.

Whispering to me gently.
Letting me know my hopes were mine.
No one had ever taken them away.
They had only been carried away for safekeeping in the land of dreams.
Until the time would come….

When I knew it was safe to believe again.

Until Tomorrow,

Mighty Morgan

Day 26...The Bigger Picture

I was sitting outside today just smoking a cigarette and looking at this tree that has been on my front lawn since I was born.

Through the years it had grown into a monstrous giant looming high into the blue of the midday sky.

Up until a few years ago it was covered in a lush blanket of emerald ivy that hung down in twisted blankets from the branches high above. With each year that passed and the tree grew the Ivy grew with it.

Beneath the covering of jaded speckled leaves; thick ropes of vines began to encircle the tree strangling it. Each new spring would reveal a part of the tree that had been choked of life from the beautiful ivy that covered it. (Click on the image to see how thick the vines were)

My parents decided that the Ivy had to go.

It took a long time of pulling away at the layers of leaves and chopping away at the monstrous vines that lay beneath it all. After many months the Ivy with no source of nutrients from it's severed vines began to shriveled up and fall away, until nothing but the skeleton of it's former self was left.

Regardless of the strangle hold that it had been in for so long...the tree still grew.

Every day it would still reach up to kiss the sunshine in the afternoon sky.
Even when parts of itself were dried and lifeless it never stopped fighting for the parts of itself that still lived.

Today as I sat outside I watched a little gray squirrel scurry through the dead branches and tangle of dried vines that still remain; cautiously he made his way across the tree until he reached a little branch that had sprouted from the dead growth.

On that branch was a little acorn that the squirrel quickly grabbed and ran down the tree to bury in the grass below for winter storage.

I started thinking how nature in all it's splendor and glory carries with it many of the same stories I carry with me in my own life. The struggles I have encountered the things I have allowed to consume me.

With all that I have been through and gone through.....no matter what I still kept moving forward.

I still carry with me my history.
I still carry with me my past.
The hurt still has a place in my heart.
The pain is still there.

The lashes that life has inflicted upon my spirit; the scars will always be there.

But yet much like the vines of the ivy it no longer has the power to slowly kill me. The remnants will stay with me forever more....but the force that threatens to choke the life from me in it's subtle deceptive ways no longer does.

My wounds.
My experiences.
My strength

Much like the little acorn....my pain now becomes a source of healing nourishment for those who have walked the paths of life I have traveled.

It becomes the hope for the next person who has suffered.
It becomes the message for the hopeless.

In rehab two years ago a man by the name of the "Rev". told me....

"You are the message for the people God brings before you".

Deep within me I knew that with all that I have encountered in this life there had to be a reason. A purpose. A meaning for it all.

I am a message of hope.

I am a living breathing message for those who struggle in the silence of their lives.

For all those who feel alone.
For all those who feel unloved.
For all those who feel unworthy.
For all those who feel forgotten about.

I have lived in that silence and struggled in the loneliness of the existence that accompanies it....yet through time I have healed.

I have found freedom.
I have found me.

I have found my way to rise above it all to kiss the sunshine in all it's glory waiting in the afternoon sky.

Until Tomorrow,

Mighty Morgan

Technorati Profile

Day 25......Looking Ahead.

Last April I was living in a woman's sober home......

I had moved into it the previous October after leaving rehab.
I remember feeling so scared at the time.
I had heard such horror stories of places like these and I still couldn't believe that I had allowed my life to fall into such shambles that the reality of my life was the.......

Welfare system.
Living in a house with 10 other women.
Sharing a small bedroom with another women.
A 10pm curfew.
Weekly Urine tests.
Restricted freedom.
Nightly Chores.
Outpatient 6 days a week.
Court appearances every few months.

But I also had absolutely no responsibility except to begin the process of healing.

When I first moved in I had no idea of where my life was going. I had no clue how to hold a job, pay bills, save money. The normal little things people do everyday were simply not part of the life I lived in active addiction.

I was so fortunate to find some amazing women in that house. Who loved and adored me as much as I grew to love them. I don't believe I have ever laughed as much as I did in the time I lived there.

Sometimes we peed ourselves laughing.....a healing medicine for the spirit.

I have been thinking about them a lot lately and what happened to them.

What few of us were left last April were told that the house would close in the next 30 days. There just was not enough women in recovery to keep the house open.

I remember feeling so angry that we were going to lose our housing.

Where were we going to go?
What would happen to the few of us that were left?

When I moved in I had decided that no matter what I would follow the suggestions of my counselors and people who had a better idea of how to live life. My plan was simple; live out my time in the sober house, accumulate some clean time, build a foundation to stand on and slowly re-introduce myself back into the world.

The house closing really messed up that plan.

But as the expression goes.........

"We make plans and God laughs"

Within three months of leaving that house I got off welfare, saved my money and on July 25, 2007 moved into my first apartment.

All on the salary of a Bagel girl which was $9.00 an hour.

The first night in my apartment I thought back to the first day I had moved into the Sober home. Frightened and full of uncertainty I had no ability to conceive that 10 months later I would be on my own.

Clean (Drug Free)
Working.
Paying Bills.
Saving Money.
Being Responsible.

One year to the date I moved in.....that apartment is now gone.

In the process of wading through the swamp of my past and the emotional detox that accompanied it, I am now in a different place. A sense of freedom has surfaced within me that wasn't available when I began this experiment 25 days ago.

The fear has released it's grip.
The frustration has un-knoted itself.
The anger has subsided.

Space has been made for hope to fill.
Hope spark the flames of faith.

When I began this experiment I wrote about my desire to live a life based upon the dreams I hold within me. As each day has passed I have begun to really understand that now my dreams have a chance to be a reality. But haven't explained exactly what it is that I want my life to be.

A few days ago I wrote a post about the fear I felt consumed with and Franco from Mind Body Spirit and Fluttering Thoughts pointed out to me that now was the time to begin to look forward. I'm so grateful for his gentle insight that nudged me to begin to turn from the past and begin the journey of looking forward. To experience the freedom I have gained and embrace the uncertainty that life presents in the unlimited potential of now!

So here is where I take another step forward and begin to really be clear in what I want to experience in my life....I'm actually a bit scared to write it but as Sibba from Seeing is Believing....suggested to me the other day..

Feel the fear and do it anyway.

So I now unleashed yet again my intentions out to the universe at large.......

I want to write for a living and get paid to do so.
I want to continue to build upon my website and make money with it...since everything is free right now.
I want to help people.
I want to see the sand and stone history of the Great Pyramids of Egypt.
I want to see the cracks of the paint as I stare up at the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.
I want to gaze at the stars dancing in the darkness from all the many forests of the world.
I want to feel the Sun on my skin from every beach that meets the oceans.
I want to travel through every country in the world and discover all that I have never known.
I want to stand beneath a waterfall and feel the cool water cascade against my skin.
I want to have my own little place in the world with beautiful garden filled with a rainbow of flowers.
I want to fall in love with someone who adores me as much as I adore them.


I want my life to be a physical manifestation of Love, Laughter, Blue Skies and Sunshine....


Until Tomorrow,
Mighty Morgan

Link Luv....Pass it on.

Technorati Profile

The sweet and lovely Walks Far Woman from Kissing the Dogwood has spread some link love my way. I'm not to sure how all this works but I'm told it's a means to help boost your Technorati ratings and help create a wider audience. The love was passed in to her by the man that seems to be EVERYWHERE spreading the love with the help her provides to other bloggers Bobby from Revellian.

So this is how it all works........

1.Write a short paragraph at the beginning of your post and link back to the blog (preferably the post url like I did at the top with Bobby’s blog, there is a link below to his blog so the one above should be to the post to avoid redundancy) that put you on the list in the paragraph. This isn’t a suggestion. You need to break up the duplicate content. Someone took the time to add you so the least you can do is give them an extra link back.

2. Copy the list of originals below COMPLETELY and add it to your blog. If you would like a different keyword for your blog then change it when you do your post and it should pass to most blogs with that keyword.

3. Take the adds from the blog that added you and place them in the “Originals” list.

4. Add at least 1 new blog that you KNOW is using the DO FOLLOW plugin to the list in the “My Adds” section. (Add no more than 5!) Let the people you’ve added know, so that they can keep the list going!

My Adds:

Phattitudes.
Perpetual Expressions
Ultimate MMA Video Blog
Backwoods Drifter
Sir Paul McCartney & The Beatles guest band purplemelon.

Originals:

A GreatPleasure Little world of thoughts Renisphere mott’s island Kev’s Walkabout iBubbs woof Down Memory Lanes Woof & Arf Lovely Mummy Bubba Stuff Mommibee Moments in My Life Rambling Moo All about Zara & Zaria Hip n cool momma Random Thoughts of a Blur Mommy Mylittleanelqianyi Bits & Pieces De’moments chinneeq Giddy Tiger Huei Rabbit Rinnah Simple America Niceheart Ethel Sanna The Queer Chef Shoshana Leahgina> Haze GheeNeng aka Sirena Angelo Ju aka The Border aka Juana of Femjo Tina Keep the Faith jsonvlog Suncoast Scribe Blogging Kenneth My 2 Centavos Worth Manila Mom 3 Dogs, 3 Pigs and A Family Cafe Romanza Earn Global Credit Ability Macuha Flee the Cube MomReviews.net Fellow Eskimo Pajama Mommy Amanita.net WebStyle Meredith’s Weight Loss Blog Pink Blog Tricia’s Musings Ugh!!’s Greymatter Honeypot Midlife Musings Utterly Geek Whatever I Feel Like My Dandelion Patch Surviving NJ GeekySpeaky Simple Kind Of Life 3DayMom BuyMeBlog The Hockey Dad Mariuca This is a Miracle Revellian d bImBo Secret of Mind Rightly Epitomised Random Magus Disjointed Intelligence WalksFarWoman FeedGet Wits End The Tall Poppy Man About the House The Process of a Miracles cmru66

So spread the "Luv" and watch how it grows..............
Technorati Profile

Day 24.....Higher Power or Lower Power

I never knew there was a difference between a higher power and a lower power. I just thought since I believed in something that was all there was to it.

But my life spoke volumes of what my belief systems were and were not.

I don't write much about what finally brought me to the end of my using. I still haven't fully come to grips with the actions I displayed at that time in my life

Don't know if I ever can.
But everything...

EVERYTHING

I do each and every day is a constant reminder of who I never want to be again.

The destruction.
The violation.
The hurt.
The violence I inflicted in people's lives.

The scars I lashed upon the spirits that will never heal in the lives of those who crossed my path....

One in particular...her name was Dolores.

How I hurt this woman was the single reason why I decided that I would never use again. Still today it leaves an emptiness in the pit of my stomach, I still beat myself up, still judge myself so harshly and don't know if I can ever forgive myself.

I will never in this lifetime be able to show her how wrong I was.
How sick I was at the time.
How the person she encountered was not who I really was.

She was the reason I got clean.
The daily reminder of who I did not want to be .

She died six months after I stopped using.

I found out about a month or so after she passed. My Mother had seen a relative at a Christening...she told my Mother of her passing.

She told my Mother how much Dolores Loved me.
How I destroyed her with my actions.
How I broke her heart.

and now she was dead.

While I was still active I though I believed in a Higher Power...
I choose to call it God because it just makes it easier.
It has nothing to do with any type of religion.

That never worked for me.

The abstract nature of religions did not account for the reality of my humanity.
The nature of my addiction.
The things I did.
The person I was.

A destructive force claiming I believed in the character of God. My actions showing my beliefs worked on a level that in no way, shape or form exemplified any of the characteristics of God.

Good
Orderly
Direction

I can take you to the streets and slums I ran through.
Show you the scams I pulled.
Show you the crimes I committed
Tell you the lies that oozed out of me each moment.
The knife I would stick in your back the moment you turned.

and then I could tell you about my higher power.

If these were the conditions of my life...what could I ever claim to know about a higher power

...except that it wasn't.

But I was driven by this missing piece for so long.
I had no idea.
Though I was forgotten about.

Discarded and thrown away...even by God.

But that wasn't the case...never was.
I just never thought to look at my beliefs in another way.

To understand the language of religion was something I didn't speak...nor did it speak to me and that it was okay.

Different Strokes for Different Folks.

The way I live today is so far removed from the shadows I lurked in two years ago. I know I am part of the solution. Who I am and the things I do on a daily basis speaks for itself about who I am and................

Who I am not.

Still two years later...it's still there.
It tries to disguise itself as fear.
A way to push my buttons to get me to react.
To drive my behavior once again.
To have me be part of the problem...

To be the problem.

I tend to freak out when it hits.
Squirm in it's grips.
Resist the lies it tells.

I Know that "This too shall Pass."

I know who I don't want to be.....

But it still lingers waiting for the moment to make its re-entrance into my life like an old long lost friend from far, far away.

Enticing me with it's sweet nothings and false hopes.
Torturing me with the uncomfortably.
Punishing me .

I don't give in.
I can't.
I won't.

It's not who I am anymore.

Until tomorrow,
Might Morgan

Viral Tagging.......Whose It???????

Viral Tagging

I was cruising through the world of blogs this evening and came across a post in Disjointed Intelligence regarding viral blogging skills and viral tag matrixs.

I honestly don't know much about this stuff...
But that doesn't mean I should just ignore the potential power it has to help me as well as others.

I do know that there is a whole blogging world out there with much more experience then me and I'm willing to follow their lead. This is a potential way to increase the amount of links and to help boost ratings of one's blog.....

After reading through the post which explains the ideas and concept of joining a viral tags matrix...

I can't argue or say anything in opposition to it.
It just makes sense.

If you want to know more please visit this post by Bobby from Revellian...he explains it much better then I could.

Without the confusion I would add to this very simple tactic.

The instructions are rather simply just follow the directions below. I myself am very curious to see the results of this.....
Although curiosity did kill the cat in the end...I'm not worried because I'm not a cat! :)

So if your interested in participating just simply follow the directions below.

========= Copy and Paste below this line ==========

The main idea of this tagging program is to allow others that got pinged by you to easily go to your site, and copy your Anchor Text (located right after “My Anchor Text”) and URL and paste them into their ViralTags Matrix. If you follow the instructions listed below exactly, it’ll make everything easier and clearer for everyone. Thank you for your participation! Enjoy!

Instructions:
1.) Copy and paste this program as indicated.
2.) Replace the anchor text located after “My Anchor Text” with your own anchor text. Also add your own anchor text in your ViralTags Matrix. Please keep anchor text to a max of 3 words to keep the matrix size manageable.
3.) When you get a ping back from someone that has your link in their ViralTags Matrix, practice good karma by copying his/her Anchor Text (automatically the associated link will also be copied) and paste it over your ViralTags Matrix below.
4.) Encourage and invite others to do the same and soon this can grow virally.

My ViralTag Matrix

My Anchor Text: The Process of a Miracle.


Text Unlimited I Startup Entrepreneur Money I Gio’s Blog I Hot MySpace LayoutsI Text Quotes Coolest Friendster Layouts I A Great Pleasure I Top Commercial Videos I Top Music Videos Virtual Entrepreneur I Bowflex-Store I Best-Cybershot I NafaSg I Search Useful Articles Revellian.com I For Tony Redgrave I IAmSearchingFor I Adventures of aLionheart I emilayusof.com I Disjointed Intelligence I The Process of a Miracle I Vlujunbaga I The miracle Process..the Next Steps I g2bgreen.com I Project Heavy Traffic I PoliticalRogueI SoccerOverload I TECHCRUSER I Daily Life Technology I Make Money Blogging I Tech-Hack Rambling I Daily Bulls Investing | Tech Gadgets Stocks | Affiliate Program | Computer Seventy-Five | Learn about e-Learning | Tech Hack Ramblings | Jack Book | Screen Writer Guy | Overseas Filipino Worker | Chilli Flakes | Top Funny Videos | Earn Money Online | Really Smart Guy | Earn Income Online | Day Mind Xpression | Entrepreneurship Internet Web | Make Money Blogging | Create a Blog | Pie Hole | start a blog | Make Money Blogging | Marketing Made Simple | Tech Startups Web2.0 | Music Videos | Text Quotes | Build Rankings Fast | Mrs Sparrow | Hot Buzz | Weight Loss | Really Funny Jokes | Best of Blogs | Heroin Addiction Codependence | Internet Marketing German | German - USA | Domain Development Blogs | Sundhed og Helbred | Giving Link Love | Business Blog Web | Photoshop Tutorials | Anitokid Chronikos | Klapkids Chronikos | esofthub’s web finds| Everything iPod | Jason’s Random Thoughts | Fun Web Development | Monetize Your Blog | Yung Silent Whisper | Stratz’s Blog | My Journey | Picture Clusters | EuroYank | The Sankey’s Stories | Blogging for Money | Wealth Blog | Yi JianLian NBA | Gadgets & Technology | Make Money Home | NFL Cleveland Browns | The Broken Bow | Pop Stars | Celebrity Gossip | Fanatic Space | Cheezmizan with Chuva | Catepol | Wolly’s Weblog | Profitable Productive Blogging | Cat on my Head | Bloggointestinale | 2012 Movies | iMod | Lorad Zarcon | Instruzioni | Sid05 Weblog | Bayle | Random Access Life | Mario’s Weblog | Acchiappasogni | Dietro e a Casa | Make Money Online | Anchor Text | Alex 2000 | My Life | Personal Finance | Hanneng.net Tech Blog | Business Twins | Pixie Tail | Gold Rushing’s Blog | Trade CDs | Business Chats | Paid to Blog | beijing olympics 2008 | Beijing Hotels | Beijing Travel | Sexy Celebrities | Stock Trading | stock option | LifeIsRisky.Com | Monkey Wong | Useful Blogging Tips | Sexy Celebrity | Global Tips and Tricks | Mariuca’s Perfume Gallery | Make Money Online | JLS Cisco Networking | Humor Jokes | Mik3 | Web2.0 Founder Interviews | Political Social Media | Master Engrafter | Making Money Online | GoldyWorld Fun | Static Thinkbox | Mariuca | Investing Women Online | Puerto Rico | The Poor Mouth | Daves Blog | Huma B~ | It’s a Miracle | Visit Egypt Online | Butterfly Feelings | Tell no Lies | McBilly’s Making Money | Earn Money Online | RideIt Like you StoleIt | yoeru | Make Money Online | Revellian | EZ Profit | Make Money Blog | TeamKyoudo | Chew on That | Bad Girls Diary | Chronic Headache | El Commentario Diario | Social Media Munching | Good Jokes | Social Networking Mother | MSU Spartan Sports | The SOHO Quest | Make Money Online | Caribbean Travel Blog | Jehzlau Concepts | Nonsense & Tears | Time Clock Software | SEO Blog | Anything and Everything | Father of One | Web Comic Artist | Justice Investmets | Terrible Horrible Evil | Russian Jokes Videos | Personal Development Blog | Movie Me! At Your Service I Static Think Box I Free Cash QuestI ProjectSoccerBet I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTagsViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags I ViralTags

Important: Once I get a ping back from you, I will add your anchor text and the associated link to my ViralTag Matrix above. As more and more bloggers copy and paste this matrix, the more backlinks you will have with your anchor text. If everybody who copy and paste from your blog does the same, pretty soon this will spread and go viral. So, the sooner you participate, the more links with anchor text you will receive.Please follow the instructions exactly, it’ll make everything easier and clearer for everyone.

Definition of terms:

• Anchor Text - Also known as Link Text, the clickable text of a hyperlink. Search engines often look at anchor text to determine what the link is about and thus infer the subject of the site to which the link points. Anchor Text can be your site or blog title or any words that would decribe your site or blog. (Ex. Transformers Blog, Autobots Online Dating, Robots In Disguise)
• URL -An acronym for “Uniform Resource Locator,” this is the address of a resource on the Internet. World Wide Web URLs begin with http:// (Ex.http:// www.yourwond3rblogg .com)
• Ping (blog ping) - A notification to a web site that a blog has been created or updated.
• Search Engine - see Google, Yahoo, MSN, Live, Technorati, and so on…
• SERP - (Search Engine Results Page) The page of results that a search engine returns.
• Google PR (PageRank) - The PageRank system is used by the popular search engine Google to help determine a page’s relevance or importance.

(ViralTags courtesy of FoundersCafe)

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Please leave a comment if you add me...just in case I don't get the ping I will add you.

Day 23.......Nothing but Silence.

Life in all is amazing glory can at times become overwhemling. Every moment seems to rush into the next without consideration for the one that just occured.

I start to flail.
Crave a second to just stop.
A moment to catch up.
Just a break to breathe.

Then I get it and find myself bored in the peaceful silence of serenity.

That's where I am at at the moment.
But it doesn't feel right.

I feel like in this process that every minute, second and moment I should be unearthing some hidden truths from within that shake my very existence to the core.

Sort of like a movie but my life is in no way, shape or form a movie.

Who I am.
Who I want to be.
Who I dare to be.

All result from the uncomfortable silence of sitting in my own skin. When all the distractions from the outside fall away and the inner can no longer be ignored; I feel the uncertainty bubbling to the surface from within.

Fear.

I have allowed that little four letter word to create havoc thorugh my entire life. It feeds off of my uncomfortability. Dares me to do something to replace the gnawing it creates in the pit of my stomach. Snickers at the thought of me falling prey to is subtle ways of creating such.......

Dis-ease within me.
That oozes out to infect every area of my life.

Not tonight
Not tommorow
Not again.

I have willingly given myself over to the fear time and time again.

But no more.

I am so far from when I started this experiment. I only gave myself thirty days but I have made enormous leaps and bounds in my own comprehension of the place I hold within this life. In the place I hold myself in within my own life.

A voice within tells me....

It's not enough.
You need more time.
It's impossible.
Settle...settle..settle.

Fuck
Everything
And
Run

That was my motto for much of my life until I learned how to turn it around and listen to the voice that lies beneath the fear which softly whispers....

It is enough.
You will have all the time you need.
Anything is possible.
Don't settle for ordinary...when you know your extraordinary.

Face
Everything
And
Recover

Freedom isn't so free.
There is a price to pay for everything.


Until tommorow,
Mighty Morgan

I've been Tagged....

I was tagged by Kristina, author of Sir Paul McCartney & The Beatles guest band purplemelon. She herself was tagged by Deborah from Life in the Fast Lane

So I guess that means I’m it!!

With the “tag” is a list of ten questions that I’ll have to answer… Just a lil’ break to let you all know me a bit better as well as an opportunity to share a few fun facts about me!!

So the instructions….

1- Remove the blog from the top, move all blogs up one, and then add yourself to the bottom.
What Floats My Boat, Homespun Honolulu, Who’s Yo Mama and Life in the Fast Lane, Sir Paul McCartney & The Beatles guest band purplemelon, The Process of a Miracle (that’s me!!!!)

2- Give five answers to the following ten questions.

3- Pass this meme on to five fellow bloggers

This is my first go at this so if I am not playing the game of tag properly…
please feel free to give me a time out :)

Now for the ten tidbits of info about me……

What were you doing ten years ago? (Five things)
1-Rehab
2-Detox
3-Getting dope sick
4-Living in Central Park
5-Stealing for a living

What were you doing one year ago? (Five things)
These are DEFINITELY an improvement from ten years ago :)
1-Getting off of welfare.
2-Moving into my own apartment.
3-Loving my life.
4-Completing Drug Outpatient successfully (261 visits total)
5-Lounging at the beach.

Five snacks you enjoy.
1-Pretzels with mustard…mmmmmmmm
2-Snow peas.
3-Watermelon.
4-Fruit & Yogurt Parfaits….yummy
5-Chocolate chip muffin tops.

Five Songs you know the lyrics to…
1-“Fool in the Rain” Led Zepplin
2-“Bohemian Rhapsody” Queen
3-“Sugar Magnolia” Grateful Dead
4-“Crazy” Pasty Cline
5-“The Wall” Pink Floyd..
“How can you have any puddin, if ya don’t eat your meat?”
You can’t have any puddin if ya don’t eat your meat”

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire.
1-Share the wealth.
2-Travel around the world.
3-Build a house on the beach…In today’s economy a small house.
4-Figure out how to be a billionaire
5-Try and stay a millionaire

Five Bad Habits.
1-Smoking
2-Smoking
3-Smoking
4-Smoking
5-Did I mention Smoking???

Five things you like to do.
1-Write
2-Laugh myself silly with good friends
3-Daydream
4-Discover the little things in life that make me happy
5-Soak up the sun at the beach

Five things you would never wear again.
1-Those paint splattered pants my Mom said were cool.
2-Penny Loafers…with a penny in them.
3-Stir-up pants (I’m with you on those Kristina)
4-Shoe boots
5-Combat boots…the days of Punk Rock.

Five favorite toys.
1-My computer
2-Kimball Lawrence..my first Cabbage Patch Doll( Long time ago)
3-mmmm don’t think I should mention that one :)
4-Do colored pencils count????
5-Geeez…. what is a toy REALLY???

Five things you hate to do.
1-Move apartments
2-PMS
3-Sit in traffic
4-Be mean to people
5-The dishes

Now since that’s done.....I now get to tag the next lucky few with this meme…

Geoff Life and times of a gay man in Idaho
Kemari Phatitudes
Jim & Emma Go! Smell the flowers.
Denny Backwoods Drifter
Walks Far Woman of Kissing the Dogwood

So now that it's official and you are it pass it on!